I broke last night, but I don’t want to hurt anymore. Everything would be better for me & for everyone else if I wasn’t here anymore. I want to die. And it hurts, but I want it all to end. And I’m sorry it didn’t work this time and I’m sorry I’m still here.
He wins. He can have whatever he wants & he can be happy, he can take everything & anything because I have no fight left in me.
One of these days it’s going to happen again. But one of these days no one will save me. And maybe it won’t solve anything but I won’t hurt anymore & I’ll be free.
You used to be the sweetest guy I knew & I know it was scary for both of us,
trusting each other & caring about someone else. But I did & I know you did too.
It’s not that I hate myself or that I think I’m not good enough at all, but I just wont ever understand why I wasn’t good enough for you.
Because it’s how you could care so much but only show me in the end & pull away & hurt me that broke me.
Even if I get over you, I don’t think I’ll ever understand why you were supposed to be in my life or why you were supposed to care & why I was supposed to love you if this is how we were supposed to end.
I hope it gets easier, I hope I do stop loving you. But I hope we don’t forget each other.